Bushism

No other Head of State is entertaining the world the way Bush is doing! The world is really going to miss him!

He has given wars for the actions lovers and for the rest of us he has provided with endless jokes and quips. Every sentence he utters is hilarious hence a new word has evolved “Bushism”

I am sure the joke creators will have a hard time from next year onwards since humor creation is not going to be that easy. I do really hope the Americans are also enjoying these Bush jokes keeping their patriotic sentiments aside. And most of the jokes are made by Bush’s own citizens.

I recently discovered that about.com has a site fully dedicated to Bush inspired jokes!


George W. Bush's Resume
George W. Bush
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave., NW
Washington, D.C. 20500
Past Work Experience
• Ran for congress and lost.
• Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.
• Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas; company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
• Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.
• With father's help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments in Previous Positions
• Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
• Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
• Set record for most executions by any governor in American history.


continued.....

"President Bush went to Iraq to boost the new government. That shows you how rough the situation is in Iraq when a guy with 30% approval rating stops by to give you a boost." --Jay Leno
"President Bush said catching a 7.5 pound fish was his best moment since becoming president. You know the sad thing, a lot of historians would agree with that." --Jay Leno
"It's tax time and President Bush is saving a lot on taxes this year. He's writing off his entire second term." --David Letterman
"I heard somebody say, 'Where's (Nelson) Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead. Because Saddam killed all the Mandelas." --George W. Bush, on the former South African president, who is still very much alive, Washington, D.C., Sept. 20, 2007

One of my concerns is that the health care not be as good as it can possibly be." --George W. Bush, on military benefits, Tipp City, Ohio, April 19, 2007



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and now......
"Are you telling me a president that's briefed every single morning, who's fixated on Iran, is not told back in August that the tentative conclusion of 16 intelligence agencies in the U.S. government said they had abandoned their effort for a nuclear weapon in '03?" Biden asked in a conference call with reporters.

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Iran was dangerous, Iran is dangerous and Iran will be dangerous if they have the knowledge necessary to make a nuclear weapon," Bush said, pointing out that Tehran continues to try to enrich uranium for civilian purposes and therefore develop technology that could be used for a weapon.
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I wish someone would tell Bush that every country would like to have nuclear weapons and every country has the knowledge necessary to develop a nuclear weapon..you just have to give them some time. But does this mean that he is going to bomb all of them?
I wish he would target Iran for other reasons... their primitive ways of punishments, fanatic religious views etc. And for this reason there are many other countries begging to be changed.... I mean if he just cannot resist meddling.

Jet Airways

Jet Airways will fly Gulf from Jan-2008.

This is good news to us Gulf wallas specially to GOC residents. All these years we were dependant on the State Carriers Air India and Indian Airlines for direct connection.

Our last trip to India was on Air India and we vowed never to board that plane again. And it was not even a Budget Airlines. We chose it since the kids were travelling unaccompanied and hence we wanted a direct flight. But it was not even direct but flying through Chennai. The agents did not tell us while booking. I know I sound un-patriotic. But then this feeling is shared by many. Air India has contracted Turkish Airways (incl crew) to fly the Gulf Sector. These planes are very small with 2 rows of seats and hence little luggage space. We were asked to shove our bags under our feet! As soon as we were settling down we heard a baby wailing. A Tang bottle had fallen from the luggage hold onto the poor baby’s head! There was shouting and swearing and it was acceptable since even the mother started crying. And the Turkish crew who knows no word of English just couldn’t console them. One of our friend who traveled in this Airlines asked for Pampers and the crew couldn’t understand what he was asking. Finally he had to produce the soiled Pampers to get a new one! (now I don’t know why he dint have a spare pamper with him!)

The worst part was the toilets! It started smelling the minute we settled down and the crew used to empty cans of neutralizers occasionally. And they don’t let you use the toilet while refueling and even when the plane has taken off. They asked us to wait until the seat belts signs are off. I think the pilot or whoever has to do it forgets to switch it off! Since there are less toilets the queue in front of the toilets are a sight to see.

I hear the Jet airways flights are well maintained. I know there will be no concession in rates during the peak seasons but at least the money that you spend is worth.

Hot Breads

Our phone number is similar to the local restaurant “Hot Breads” except for the last number and we often get calls from customers, but yesterday was hilarious!
Wish I could write this in my own language…
Caller: “Hello, is this Avarachan?”
Hubby: No
Caller : Is this Hot Breads
Hubby: No
Caller: Please keep 2 Chicken and Paratha ready
That is when I saw Hubby’s frustration turn to something else…
Hubby: How many Parathas?
Caller : 10
Hubby: should I sent it to you.
Caller : No, I am coming, please keep ready.

I was listening to this conversation the whole time and was bewildered wondering what he is planning to send! And that is when Hubby explained.. oh we laughed and laughed..