All about Norway

Norway has once again grabbed the headlines! This time an Indian couple was arrested in Norway after scolding their child for wetting his pants! Earlier another Indian couple Anurup and Sagarika Bhattacharya lost custody of their two children, Abhigyan, 3, and Aishwarya, 1, in May of last year. 

But the fact of the matter is that if India was Norway even for a day, every Indian parent would be in jail! 

Short of strangling, "normal" Indian parent would have committed every other offense that may put them in jail if they were in Norway. We scold, threaten, pinch and many even use the cane to put our children on track. What track, only God knows! If you look at my blog and the most popular post, it is about me punishing our son for lying. I have always wondered if some Child Authority in the world is monitoring this blog to one day arrest me and put me in jail! Yes, I did beat him that day! Of course not severely. Luckily our children have not given us much chance to exercise our parental authority. They have been well behaved and now that they are old, I have realized that it is no longer necessary. But for most Indian parent, the crimes that put you in jail in Norway are a part of their own growing up. There is no way they will change overnight! Anyway this post is not about parenting but about Norway so let me get on with it.

The Nordic country as you know tops in the happiness index.

To the surprise of absolutely no one, Norway has been declared the world's happiest country. Just as unsurprising, the Democratic Republic of Congo came last.

The United Nations Human Development Index 2011 measures happiness in different countries based on factors such as income, education, health, life expectancy, economy, gender equality and sustainability.

So when I mentioned this during a discussion on FB regarding the arrest, a friend pointed out the following as a reason for the same:

As per United Nations, Monthly Bulletin of Statistics, April 2001, the Number of marriages per 1,000 people per year in Norway is only 5.1 :)

So marriage seems to be the culprit. But it is true that most children in Norway are born out of wedlock and there is no stigma attached with it. Most couples are like Brad and Angelina! If Bragelina started thinking about marriage after their kids (six of them) started bugging them, Nordic couples too think of marriage only after a couple of children. 

The willingness to accept so-called “open unions” or “uncertified marriages” in the Nordic countries has been under way for a very long time, many decades before the term “same-sex marriage” was even coined. In Finland, for example, attitudes to marriage started to change substantially after World War II. During the period 1950 to 1984, there was a sharp increase in the number of unmarried couples.

“Since the late 1960s, the practice of cohabitation had become increasingly common, so much so that by the late 1970s most marriages in urban areas grew out of what Finns called ‘open unions,’ according to the Encyclopedia of Women’s History.

But there are various reasons why they opt for such a union. 

But there are various reasons Scandinavian couples decide to wait. Putting a priority on education, career, or buying an apartment are some of the reasons. The high cost of a traditional wedding is another. “If you have children you may not be able to afford to get married. A wedding can be very expensive,” observes soon-to-be-married Malin Larsson of Sweden, currently on paid parental leave to take care of her young daughter.

If an expensive wedding is one reason then India has every reason to follow the Scandinavian formula! 

As for government: 

Norway is a unitary parliamentary democracy and constitutional monarchy, with King Harald V as its head of state and Jens Stoltenberg as its prime minister.

India too can follow the same. Declare the Gandhi family as the reigning King or Queen and get on with governance! 

Norwegians have done pretty well in governance and statistics proves so.

Norwegians enjoy the second highest GDP per-capita (after Luxembourg) and fourth highest GDP (PPP) per-capita in the world. Today, Norway ranks as the second wealthiest country in the world in monetary value, with the largest capital reserve per capita of any nation.

Now I read that the Indian couples are indeed in trouble since they burned and belted their child!

Parenting can be stressful and one can lose sanity very easily but it is always good to remember that it is your own genes that is inside them and there are many things that just cannot be corrected by being cruel to them. You may watch your own shortcomings in them and would badly want to correct it but it is always better to do it in a gentler manner.

http://www.nordicreach.com/its_about/lifestyle/135/
http://travel.cnn.com/explorations/life/united-nations-announces-world%E2%80%99s-happiest-country-247768
http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/peo_mar_rat-people-marriage-rate&int=-1
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norway

The 5 Principles to Unlocking Wealth

The following is an excerpt from a book:


These principles are a key to unlocking amazing cache of wealth, abundance and success. They are all centered on our true innate qualities, which as a matter of fact are universal and have a spiritual basis. These principals are:



Beautiful Munnar



 Truth


 Righteousness


 Peace


 Love, and


 Non-violence

The practice of these virtues will enable anyone to progress in life without any doubt.

The reason is simple.

These universal principles are all attractive and needless to say, they form the cornerstone of the code of ethics. You cannot go wrong practicing the importance to moral values, codes of conduct and obeying the Law of Nature in your pursuit of wealth.

Pessimism

While pessimism warns us of dangers lurking before our very own eyes, optimism may propel us into false security. Pessimism should only be considered initial and not a final predicament in any situation - this is the first step to success.

The Basic Steps


The following guidelines will help you pave a wonderful path to your ultimate success.

The steps are very simple to implement in your daily life.

1. Do what you love and what you are good at.

2. Be prepared to learn and to be positive (motivation and enthusiasm)

3. Be an innovative individual.

4. Be prepared to invest not just money but your time, effort and resources too.

I mentioned money - this does not mean that you have to incest a large sum to become wealthy.

5. You must be disciplined in having set goals and targets. Remember that persistence is the key to success.

6. You must be prepared to manage your time effectively.

7. As you evolve, learn to give back what you amass to society. I call this philanthropy.

You must have a solid vision - one in which you "see" yourself having attained success. Great people of the past and present see to it that they reach this coveted position by employing these basic steps.

Action is incredibly important and highlights success - the two are synonymous to be quite honest. To succeed action is needed but the essential ingredient is how serious you are. Being too serious can ruin your business venture, so the point is to have FUN.

Our inner also environment plays a huge role. A calm relaxed individual is far more likely to come out a winner in a trying situation that his/her counterpart - a person who is nervous, frustrated and erratic. The former has his senses fully identified with the environment in which he places himself.


However, the restless individual does not understand the environment and consequently gets into trouble. The keywords are focus, concentration and care in whatever you do in life.

1. Develop a definite and a clear-cut goal/aim.

2. Draw up a wise workable plan/program.

3. Guard your health. Without health there is no real wealth.

4. You must conserve your energy.

5. Be honest in your life (in words, deeds, thoughts and actions)

6. Stick to virtues and adopt good principles.

7. Reflect upon ideal personalities and seek strength from their philosophy.

8. Seek divine guidance and be truthful.

9. Endeavor to help and serve others with gratitude.

10. Always think positive and believe in the power of God.

Transformative thinking is indeed the way to success. Set out a plan to achieve your goal and deliberately ruminate over the meaning of this plan and make it happen.


But if the above is overwhelming then all you need is join Indian politics :)

Rules of Life

Found this brilliant piece in FB and wanted to know if it was truly authored by Bill Gates, especially since one knows that he was not so fond of Harward and had dropped out. But then he was a brilliant student; if not, Harward would not have admitted him. And, not all can become a Bill Gates.



Anyway, the full text is as below and About.com says the following:

As frequently happens when texts are repeatedly copied and forwarded over time, something written by one person has come to be attributed to another. Here, the displaced text is a pared-down version of an op-ed piece by education reformer Charles J. Sykes, best known as the author of Dumbing Down Our Kids: Why American Children Feel Good about Themselves, but Can't Read, Write, or Add. The op-ed was originally published in the San Diego Union-Tribune in September 1996. It began making the email rounds under Bill Gates' name in February 2000, and has continued to do so ever since.

Forwarded-by: Daniel Rogers rogersd@nanaimo.island.net

Some rules kids won't learn in school

Text By Charles J. Sykes

Printed in San Diego Union Tribune

September 19, 1996


Unfortunately, there are some things that children should be learning in school, but don't. Not all of them have to do with academics. As a modest back-to-school offering, here are some basic rules that may not have found their way into the standard curriculum.



Rule No. 1: Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teen-ager uses the phrase, "It's not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule No. 1.


Rule No. 2: The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as much as your school does. It'll expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself. This may come as a shock. Usually, when inflated self-esteem meets reality, kids complain it's not fair. (See Rule No. 1)


Rule No. 3: Sorry, you won't make $40,000 a year right out of high school. And you won't be a vice president or have a car phone either. You may even have to wear a uniform that doesn't have a Gap label.


Rule No. 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait 'til you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure, so he tends to be a bit edgier. When you screw up, he's not going to ask you how you feel about it.


Rule No. 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grand-parents had a different word of burger flipping. They called it opportunity. They weren't embarrassed making minimum wage either. They would have been embarrassed to sit around talking about Kurt Cobain all weekend.


Rule No. 6: It's not your parents' fault. If you screw up, you are responsible. This is the flip side of "It's my life," and "You're not the boss of me," and other eloquent proclamations of your generation. When you turn 18, it's on your dime. Don't whine about it, or you'll sound like a baby boomer.


Rule No. 7: Before you were born your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way paying your bills, cleaning up your room and listening to you tell them how idealistic you are. And by the way, before you save the rain forest from the blood-sucking parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your bedroom.


Rule No. 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers. Life hasn't. In some schools, they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. Failing grades have been abolished and class valedictorians scrapped, lest anyone's feelings be hurt. Effort is as important as results. This, of course, bears not the slightest resemblance to anything in real life. (See Rule No. 1, Rule No. 2 and Rule No. 4)


Rule No. 9: Life is not divided into semesters, and you don't get summers off. Not even Easter break. They expect you to show up every day. For eight hours. And you don't get a new life every 10 weeks. It just goes on and on. While we're at it, very few jobs are interesting in fostering your self-expression or helping you find yourself. Fewer still lead to self-realization. (See Rule No. 1 and Rule No. 2.)


Rule No. 10: Television is not real life. Your life is not a sitcom. Your problems will not all be solved in 30 minutes, minus time for commercials. In real life, people actually have to leave the coffee shop to go to jobs. Your friends will not be as perky or pliable as Jennifer Aniston.


Rule No. 11: Be nice to nerds. You may end up working for them. We all could.


Rule No. 12: Smoking does not make you look cool. It makes you look moronic. Next time you're out cruising, watch an 11-year-old with a butt in his mouth. That's what you look like to anyone over 20. Ditto for "expressing yourself" with purple hair and/or pierced body parts.


Rule No. 13: You are not immortal. (See Rule No. 12.) If you are under the impression that living fast, dying young and leaving a beautiful corpse is romantic, you obviously haven't seen one of your peers at room temperature lately.


Rule No. 14: Enjoy this while you can. Sure parents are a pain, school's a bother, and life is depressing. But someday you'll realize how wonderful it was to be a kid. Maybe you should start now.

You're welcome.

A letter...

A Beautiful letter written by a father to his daughter says the forwarded email.

Following is a letter to his daughter from a renowned Hong Kong TV broadcaster and Child Psychologist. The words are actually applicable to all of us, young or old, children or parents.!

I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons.

1. Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable, nobody knows how long it lives. Some words are better said early.

2. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.

3. What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches.

Remember the following as you go through life.

1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I. To those  who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every move. When  a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.

2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess. Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through  life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose what/who you love most.

3. Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better you enjoy life.

4. Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time and with one's mood. If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.

5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does not mean that you cannot be successful by not studying hard! Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags to riches, but one has to start from some rags!

6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, neither would I financially support your whole life. My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up. After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or in your limousine, whether rich or poor.

7. You honour your words, but don't expect others to be so. You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.

8. I have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but I never strike any prize. That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard..! There is no free lunch..!

9. No matter how little time I have with you, let's treasure the time we have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life.

Wisdom speaks....

Saw this in many blogs and I am tempted to post it even here...

The wisdom of a great Father shines through.....

A letter written by Abraham Lincoln to the head master of his school in which his son was studying...

He will have to learn, I know, that all men are not just, all men are not true. But teach him also that for every scoundrel there is a hero: that far every selfish politician, there is a dedicated leader…


Teach him that for every enemy there is a friend. It will take time, I know a long time, but teach, if you can, that a dollar earned is of more value then five of found.


Teach him, to learn to lose…And also to enjoy winning. Steer him away from envy, if you can, teach him the the secret of quiet laughter.


Teach him, if you can the wonder of books…But also given quiet time wonder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun, and flowers on the green hillside.


In school teach him, it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat…


Teach him to have faith in his own idea, even if everyone tells him they are wrong…


Teach him to be gentle with gentle people and tough with tough.


Teach him to listen to all men…But teach him also to filter all he hears on a screen of truth, and take only the good one that comes through.


Teach him, if you can, how to laugh when he is sad. Teach him there is no shame in tear.


Teach him to sell his brawn and brain to the highest bidder but never to put a prize tag on his heart and soul.


Teach him gently, but do not cuddle him, because only the test of fire makes the fine steel.


Teach him always to have sublime faith in himself because only then he will have faith in mankind.


This is a big order, but see what can you do… He is such a fine little fellow, my son!

Recovering India's money

This is the first time I have deleted a post and it was something that landed in my inbox about recovering the money in the Swiss bank.. when I checked on the people behind the initiative, I did not like what I read about most of them...

Motherhood... a never ending journey...

Have been tagged by Smitha and IHM; both versatile bloggers and great Moms, to write about motherhood. Let me try and do some justice.

Motherhood…. the word that has the most warmth and hopefulness.

Nothing else in this world can change a person and the world overnight! At first it is the excitement of waiting eagerly to see what one has produced [of course jointly :)]. And can one be blamed if one sees it as the perfect creation? My sonogram taken only since the doctor requested, predicted 90% boy child and hence we were totally surprised and delighted to find our first born to be a girl.

When one embarks upon the journey of motherhood, you want everything to go perfectly. This child should feel nothing wanting; not if one can help it. You strive to be a better mother than your own... and can we ever be? Ah..from there starts the incredible journey of discovering your own mother/father in bits and pieces.

My mother was at home for me but that luxury was something I had to forgo. But then I never wanted to be a stay at home mother until I became a mother! Strange?

The endless burping that kept the little one awake after I fed her.. was it all those oranges that I sneaked in since only a glass of water was allowed? (to tighten one’s stomach they say and with no internet nor my own mother, I was under the mercy of the midwife!)

The first day of work and you have to leave your precious with the maid. I dreaded it and would have done anything to change it.

The endless phone calls with the exasperated maid (and countless thereafter that we had to experiment with) . Can’t I just trust them?

The days flew too fast until we discovered by accident that the next one was due soon! (And was it not for “accidents” we would have never gone for the second and hence would have missed the next bundle of joy!)

The sneaked in kisses to the little one who came in a little too early, so as not to offend our first born. Was it jealousy that I saw on her face? How it hurt me to see that look on her face. How could I ever make her understand that she was equally precious to me? And this task continues; the mystery of sibling rivalry shall never be solved they say. Sometimes they purposely use it to test us.

Then you discover that you daughter just like yourself thinks her father is the perfect one. I pray that she, just like her own mother will do her very best for her dear father. As for son; he knows how to make a fool of both the parents. And after a while you surrender your “know all” attitude and offer “pranam”. Yea we have to grow up and change in time with the kids.

So before I go on and on endlessly let me list the few things that I can remember and love about motherhood, if I have not already stated them!

• It is the most life changing event. Nothing prepares one for it but once you get the little one in your hands then motherhood comes to you naturally. All those tiny doubts vanish and you are left with entirely new ones which you never fathomed!

• If one needs to understand the Almighty then motherhood / fatherhood is the best school. Your kids teach you the true meaning of unconditional love. While we as parents also give unconditional love, showing it is not equally spontaneous ( reminds me yet again to demonstrate the love that I have for them). As for one’s faith.. if one has not developed it along with the ups and downs of motherhood then I think nothing else can do it so well.

• Do you cry in front of strangers? Yes.. motherhood makes you to do that. Motherhood exposes one’s vulnerability and there is nothing that you can do about it. You are capable of emotions (even anger) in an entirely new way. You take interest in every event/article that maybe remotely connected with your children.

• Dreams….you stop dreaming for yourself, and pick up your children’s dreams. (not a good practice?) The dreams can vary as years go by. Son wanted to be a police Inspector until the recent Bombay massacre. Then it was the army or a fighter pilot. As for daughter, we have no idea from where she picked up the idea of Indian Civil Service.. but we keep hearing lofty dreams. “Can I keep those roads perfect if I become a “Collector”?” “I shall ban all the cigarette companies if I become a “Collector”” ah.. If only she knew! Our textbooks, schools and our country have not failed to inspire our children, if only we could keep those flames alive. I dream for my children a country devoid of corruption and where our youngsters will not turn cynical and where their dreams are not quashed.

• Politics was Greek to me and a subject I abhorred until motherhood forced me to look into it. I realized that my children’s future is entwined with the politics and economics of my country and I started paying attention to dear Hubby. Now, the news channel is what gets my most attention!

• Motherhood/parenthood makes one finally understand your parents. Your parents become more precious to you.





Over the years we always wish we could have done it differently! The quest for perfect mothering never ends…...

Be ragged or else be damned?

When did we start seeing “ragging” as a part of college curriculum?

Is ragging necessary to mould a student?

I have heard students and teachers justify “ragging”. They say it helps a person to face the real world. Is it so? Will the scars of ragging ever fade? And sometimes the scars can be physical too as in this recent case in a reputed college in Coimbatore.

Another ragging incident jolts India
Sunday, 12.04.2009, 08:29am (GMT)
Kochi/Coimbatore : Ragging extends to be a threat in colleges despite severe stricture passed by the Supreme Court to ban it.

Another shocking incident has come to light this time in Tamil Nadu. The incident dates back to March 8, a day after the medical student buckled under to injuries inflicted by his seniors at a private-run institute in Himachal Pradesh.

A 19-year old fresher at the PSG College of Arts and Science in Coimbatore was ragged savagely, nearly losing his eye.

Akil Dev is now recouping at his home in Kochi, and has underwent two operations in the eyes so far.

New Delhi, Friday 13 March 2009:

In another shocking incident of a student being ragged in college, a girl student of an agriculture engineering college in Andhra’s Baptla town has attempted suicide. The 20-year-old student of the Government Agriculture Engineering College attempted suicide after allegedly being ragged and physically abused by her seniors.
Reports say that, the alleged victim was forced to strip and dance as part of ragging. Embarrassed by the entire episode, she consumed a hairdye solution and collapsed. Some reports also state that it may have been pesticides that she consumed.

The meaning of Ragging:

- to scold somebody persistently or vehemently
- to subject somebody to persistent teasing or taunting

Yes, it is taunting as a start and those who resist the taunting are then subjected to torture.

I remember my hostel days in Trivandrum where one student in our batch was caught ragging her juniors. The punishment that was meted out was for the whole batch and I still remember standing in the open area in the middle of the hostel and writing imposition. We did try to have a little fun out of it, but none of us ever wanted to rag. And none of my friends ever found ragging fun and I don’t remember being ragged. But the scene has changed over the recent years and now students are scared to join some colleges in fear of ragging. I have heard it myself from parents and students. Some parents were forced to seek admission in “safer” colleges for their wards after having paid the fees and when the wards refused to continue. Some students eventually lose a year for this sake. Do we call these students “chicken hearted”? I do not think so. Even if a student end up being a total “nerd” for not having interacted normally with the students, I guess it would be fine than scarring him/her permanently. And our world does need such students too.

I was relieved to find this on the web:

http://www.noragging.com/

http://noragging.blogspot.com/

A love letter

Thanks to the internet, I have now started receiving love letters.

The below one is classic and I can see that he is already honing his skills for the future. Wonder how many he will sent once he starts admiring girls.....



Amma I love you so much . U r my angel......

FATHER FORGETS W. Livingston Larned

The other day, I discovered that our son was not eating his sandwiches, lovingly packed by myself. He used to keep it in his bag and I as usual used to ask him daily if he finished it. "Yes" was the answer always. Naturally I was mad with him for lying, for not eating and for wasting food.

I asked him why and he said he wanted to play during break time. I lost my temper and thrashed him! Yes I did.. and then remorse set in. Why did I do it? but my poor son is as always very forgiving... he lovingly accepted all the kisses that I showered upon him. Sometimes I cant but act out the proverb "Spare the rod and spoil the child" .. anyway thank God it only rarely and my Hubby has much better patience when it comes to thrashing, more because he feels he will go out of control. But as for criticism, I guess both of us are equally bad.. we expect too much from our kids.

I am reading Dale Carnegie's book - How to win people and influnse friends.. a great book and I came across this article which was re-printed from the Readers Digest...

...................................................................

Listen, son: I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw
crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your
damp forehead. I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few
minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave
of remorse swept over me. Guiltily I came to your bedside.
There are the things I was thinking, son: I had been cross to you. I
scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your
face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning
your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things
on the floor.
At breakfast I found fault, too. You spilled things. You gulped down
your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too
thick on your bread. And as you started off to play and I made for
my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, "Goodbye,
Daddy!" and I frowned, and said in reply, "Hold your shoulders
back!"
Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came up the
road I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were
holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before your boyfriends by
marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive -
and if you had to
buy them you would be more careful! Imagine that, son, from a
father!
Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you
came in timidly, with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I
glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you
hesitated at the door. "What is it you want?" I snapped.
You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and
threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small
arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your
heart and which even neglect could not wither. And then you were
gone, pattering up the stairs.
Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my
hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me. What has habit
been doing to me? The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding - this
was my reward to you for being a boy. It was not that I did not love
you; it was that I expected too much of youth. I was measuring you
by the yardstick of my own years.
And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your
character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself over
the wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush
in and kiss me good night. Nothing else matters tonight, son. I have
come to your bed-side in the darkness, and I have knelt there,
ashamed!
It is a feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these
things if I told them to you during your waking hours. But tomorrow
I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you
suffer, and laugh when you laugh. I will bite my tongue when
impatient words come. I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: "He is
nothing but a boy - a little boy!"
I am afraid I have visualized you as a man. Yet as I see you now,
son, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby.
Yesterday you were in your mother's arms, your head on her
shoulder. I have asked too much, too much.
Instead of condemning people, let's try to understand them. Let's try
to figure out why they do what they do. That's a lot more profitable
and intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and
kindness. "To know all is to forgive all."
As Dr. Johnson said: "God himself, sir, does not propose to judge
man until the end of his days."
Why should you and I?


Principal I - Don't criticize, condemn or complain...

Hope to condense the book and put it up here.. I am sure many have done it already....

Bucket of Water

Most of us sleeping in A/C rooms atleast here in Kuwait, have experienced parched lips and dry skins while waking up in the morning. A month back a friend suggested keeping some water in a bucket. And it worked! I guess the theory behind is simple. The evaporated water provides sufficent moisture to the circulating air.

2 days back we forgot this and my son woke up with cracked lips and even my lips were beginning to crack.

Wish we had know this trick earlier.

A Father's Prayer

Felt very tempted to copy this prayer......

A Father's Prayer


This is the best dowry of hopes, wishes and prayers I would be able to offer:

May God give you the grace of wit and wisdom to understand that rainbows are only the result of showers, dust, and hope.

May you always have joy in the morning and trust in the evening and may your sorrows be short and without scars.

May your lives have a spirit neither bent by belligerence nor broken by failure; may you simply love each other.

May you share with each other spring flowers, dirty dishes, music, rain, death, mushrooms, a measure of boredom, strawberries, and God.

May that God never make you immune to the wonderful afflictions of real love, making you instead farsighted to each other's faults, tongue-tied to criticism, and short of memory to petty hurts and slights.

May God provide the confidence and serenity that comes only from the assurance of each other's fidelity and the tolerance, as years go by, of wrinkles and gray hairs, short tempers, curlers, and Monday mornings.

May no one steal from you laughter at the top of the stairs or giggles and whispers in a dark room.

May you keep a hunger for each other, the appetite to taste tomorrow, and deep knowledge of and devotion to your past, heritage and families.

May you perpetuate trust, the radiation of vitality, kind answers to sharp questions and sharp humor to unkind attitudes.

May your fights be fierce and short, and may each truce be warm and long and held in each other's arms before the sun comes up.

May you walk with wise men, sing loud songs at late hours, share secrets, have healthy children, and provide smiles for lonesome strangers and prayers for those without hope.

May you never forget small things; smiles, birthdays, holding hands, family, old friends, the neglected, and the simplicity of saying please and thank you.

May you keep a warm, generous, and happy house where love is the insulation and God is present.

May your union bring a smile to the face of the Almighty and may his spirit live in your pots and pans, in your hope and aspirations.


- Author Unknown

Mother's Prayer

It is said that a Mother’s prayer is the most powerful on Earth. God and heaven pauses to listen to her prayers.. after all a mother is appointed by God to look after the children until they can stand on their own. I have always believed this.. especially when I left the kids with the maid, when they were sick, when they were going to appear for their exams and even at quiet moments while they are sleeping – I say a short prayer for their well being since whatever efforts I may put, I can achieve nothing without the help from the Almighty.

So I guess as mothers it is our duty to pray for our children like our own mother has done and no child is too old for our prayers.

Child's Ten Commandments to Parents by: Author Unknown, Source Unknown

1. My hands are small. Please don't expect perfection whenever I make a bed, draw a picture or throw a ball. My legs are short. Please slow down so that I can keep up with you.


2. My eyes have not seen the world as yours have. Please let me explore safely. Don't restrict me unnecessarily.
   


3. Housework will always be there. I'm only little for such a short time. Please take time to explain things to me about this wonderful world, and do so willingly.


4. My feelings are tender. Please be sensitive to my needs. Don't nag me all day long. (You wouldn't want to be nagged for your inquisitiveness.) Treat me as you would like to be treated.


5. I am a special gift from God. Please treasure me, holding me accountable for my actions, giving me guidelines to live by and disciplining me in a loving manner.


6. I need your encouragement and your praise to grow. Please go easy on the criticism. Remember, you can criticize the things I do without criticizing me.


7. Please give me the freedom to make decisions concerning myself. Permit me to fail so that I can learn from my mistakes. Then someday, I'll be prepared to make the kind of decisions life requires of me.


8. Please don't do things over for me. Somehow that makes me feel that my efforts didn't quite sure up to your expectations. I know it's hard, but please don't try to compare me with my other or my sister.
   


9. Please don't be afraid to leave for a weekend together. Kids need vacations from parents, just as parents need vacations from kids. Besides, it's a great way to show us kids that your marriage is very special.
   


10. Please take me to worship regularly, setting a good example for me to follow.
    

Vicks on the soles

It was an email forwarded by a caring mother. For coughs try rubbing Vicks on the soles of the feet and put on a pair of socks. I had to try it yesterday for my son who was coughing very badly.. and it worked. At least he was coughing less.

Then one can try Granny's home remedies:

1- the dry ginger + honey
2- boiling garlic and serving the reduced liquid with honey

Make the internet safe for children

The other day I was shocked to find a few obscene words(not deadly) typed onto the search column of Google... was it my kids aged 10 & 11?

They were given internet access recently and were playing online games. On checking with them, came to know that certain links were on the games page itself and when curiosity got the better of them they went on to search!

I thanked God that I stumbled upon this earlier enough to block the internet for safe usage and to give my kids a heart to heart talk on the danger of internet. I pray that they have understood the seriousness of the matter. I really do not want them to waste their time on unwanted sites and spoil their mental health. This is the time when they should study and aquire knowledge.

There are many sites giving free Web blockers for the caring parents...