Showing posts with label Children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Children. Show all posts

Thursday, December 28, 2023

Milestones

Our life is measured by milestones and the majority of us cannot escape it's hold on us. When we are born, our parents count the milestones. Our first word, first steps, and it goes on until one is put in school. And from there, we take over the counting. As children, all we ever wanted to do want was play. I can still remember the excitement and the anticipation that one had when the time came to play. In those days it used to be any game and mostly outside. And then we ourselves started to give more importance to the milestones and forgot to enjoy the journey itself.

One such milestone happened in my life too; our daughter's marriage. Only when the time started to plan the wedding ceremony did it dawn upon me that she will soon leave to start her own family. Yes... I panicked and lost sleep too. I wanted to have more of her in the short that time that one had which was impossible. 

I try telling others to enjoy the time when they have their baby or when they are going to school. But then there is no use, since all are counting milestones and only a few are lucky to enjoy all the lovely moments in between.


Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Aham Bhumika

Thought I shall dedicate this post to . Have been seeing their tweets and the least I could do was an RT. Today I saw a request from them to re-post the following on blogs. 

‘Aham Bhumika’ is an NGO, a group of like minded people based in Bhopal, a city in the state of Madhya Pradesh in India. The diverse group consists of artists, housewives, engineers, tourist guides, teachers and government employees. 
        Gift a book to our library of rural  children 
Ahambhumika, working with the rural children in village Borda, Bhopal intends to set up a small library for the rural children. For these children, having a story book is a luxury.
At Ahambhumika we have a support centre for our rural children namely Mehak (Fragrance) wherein there are 120 children in the age group of 4 to 14 years.


We need people willing to support us in this initiative.The books and magazines  discarded by your children will be of immense use to our children.
What we need :  1. We need books in Hindi and English. 2. The books need to be on the topic of interest of children who are in the age group of 4 to 14 years.3. The books need to be of use for the children like  story books, Art and craft books, Biographies, Autobiographies, Cartoon, Colouring  books and Magazines.
How to send old books / magazinesThe best way of sending  books  and magazines discarded by your children is through Speed Post service of Government of India. The charges of Speed Post are very economical and you can track the books shipped through them.
( At the bottom is the address to send the books )

From where  to gift new books If you wish to donate new books, then books published by Pratham books are the best option. The Pratham books are very economical and cover all topics of interests in Hindi and English as well.You can connect with them on Twitter    You can choose books from following  link of Pratham books http://store.prathambooks.org/control/keywordsearch?SEARCH_STRING=Hindi You may order them directly to deliver the books to us on the following address.Ahambhumika Swayam Sevi Sanstha65, Elegant Estate, ( Sai Ganesh Mandir ) Near Mother Tereasa School, Bairagarh Chichli, Kolar Road, Bhopal -4620042 .For any query mail us at ahambhumika@gmail.com  Lastly : If you wish you may contribute financially too. The financial contribution made by you will be utilized to buy shelves, almirah and activity books.

Online bank transfer Aham Bhumika Swayam Sevi SansthaSavings Account Number 2073 1010 15874ISFC CODE :CNRB 000 2073Canara Bank Branch : Maharana Pratap Nagar , Bhopal. 

Aham Bhumika I believe was started by Subrat Goswami  who works with the Archaeological Survey of India. 



Thursday, April 12, 2012

Love them

Our neighbor’s daughter keeps visiting us whenever she can. She is going to be 2 years and is a very smart and loving girl. She was brought up by her grandparents since her mother came back to Kuwait after her birth. She joined her parents only recently. It is great to have her around but the other day only I was in the house since my children had gone for tuitions and hubby to cut his hair. I tried entertaining her but she was much attached to my daughter whom she missed. And then while I was sitting next to her, she took a cushion, placed it on her stretched legs and made me place my head on it. Then she started gently tapping me and saying “ba ba”.. It was such a happy moment for me. Later when I tried placing a chain on her, she removed it and wanted to dress me up! She is rightly named “Jewel” and she is being looked after like a precious jewel. Her mother leaves her with me only when she is tied up with some housework. Since I have passed that stage, I am aware how hectic it can be for her. But somehow these days my thoughts refuse to leave Afreen. As you might know she left this world which failed to love her.

Being a mother to a daughter, I know how loving they are. They need just a bit of love to blossom. They need only a bit of love to return the love in manifold. They would even be ready to die for you.

Even Afreen would have grown up the same way. But she was not allowed to. My heart cries for little ones like her who are born in the wrong place and into wrong hands. My heart weeps for her mother, who must have tried her best. I saw her crying yesterday and hope her tears won’t be in vain. The nation needs to act for future Afreens. There is no way we can hope that such monsters will not do their act. They have already been given birth are in this world and must be getting ready to marry, to hope for boys, to hope for a huge dowry and hoping to kill until they get what they want.


In India, we have the The National Commission for Protection of Child Rights (NCPCR):

The National Commission for Protection of Child Rights (NCPCR) emphasises the principle of universality and inviolability of child rights and recognises the tone of urgency in all the child related policies of the country. For the Commission, protection of all children in the 0 to 18 years age group is of equal importance.
This commission acts when they receive complaints on behalf of a child. I am sure Afreen’s mother was not in a position to complain or she did not know where to seek help. It is time this commission made every parent register as soon as a baby is born into this world. The Panchayat needs to keep track of these children too. I am sure there are enough funds. The commission also need to place cradles in every panchayat so that such unwanted babies are not killed. Maybe it is time the government started foster homes like those found in the US. From the cradles they can go into those who hope to adopt them.


There are many schemes under NCPCR one being the The Integrated Child Protection Scheme (ICPS) All States and UTs except   J&K have signed MoU to implement ICPS.

They also have monitoring schemes:


Monitoring Formats for ICPS


1. Monitoring Formats for the Central Level Monitoring


2. Monitoring Formats for the State Level Monitoring


3. Explanatory Notes


4. Online Submission of Monitoring Reports

They also have a childline service.

CHILDLINE SERVICE



This Govt. of India launched Childline Service during the year 1998-99. The child line is a 24 hours free phone service, which can be accessed by a child in distress or an adult on his behalf by dialing the number 1098 on telephone. Child line provides emergency assistance to a child and subsequently based upon the child’s need, the child is referred to an appropriate organization for long-term follow up and care.
The Kerala state has also done much in this aspect under the KERALA STATE COUNCIL FOR CHILD WELFARE.

Other than the various programs for women and child they also have a Creche Programne which takes care of children.


CRECHE PROGRAMME


The Kerala State Council for Child Welfare took on the task of setting up crèches for children of working and ailing mothers from the lower socio economic strata of society in 1975. The programme caters to children between the age group of 0-3 yerars. There are 250 creches under the control of the Council, financed by Indian council for Child Welfare These crèches serve the purpose of providing a safe, secure and healthy environment to babies, allowing older children to attend school instead of dropping out, for taking care of sibling and helping mothers to work as they are assured of the safety of their children. The services provided in these crèches include health care, supplementary nutrition, immunisation recreation as well as non formal education. A maximum of 25 children are taken care in each crèche by a trained crèche worker and a helper.

They also have electronic cradles. This needs to be in every state.

SUPPORTIVE SERVICES OF KERALA  STATE COUNCIL FOR CHILD WELFARE

ELECTRONIC CRADLE



Every Child has a right to live. Unfortunate occasions (!) compel persons to discard their babies. Such abandonment in public unhygienic places threaten their lives. To save these kids Council have established an Electronic Cradle (Ammathottil) on 14th November 2002. Now there are Electronic Cradles in all the districts in Kerala.

These babies if lucky might find a good and loving home from adoption centres. One such called Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services sources kids from India.


Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services (JOH) is passionate about adoption – we truly believe that adoption is a win-win situation for the child and the adopting parents and playing a role in it is a tremendous joy
Let the girl child live. She will never let you down.


Edited to add:
Maxwell Pereira, a former Joint Commissioner of Police for the New Delhi Range of the Capital City, says that female infanticide happens at a larger scale in affluent societies than in underprivileged neighborhoods.



“In Delhi, again South Delhi has the highest percentage”, he said in an interview with CNN IBN
http://www.firstpost.com/india/female-infanticide-affluent-south-delhi-tops-capital-chart-273279.html

http://wcd.nic.in/
http://wcd.nic.in/icpsmon/st_mf.aspx
http://www.hindu.com/2009/02/11/stories/2009021151940300.htm
http://journeysoftheheart.net/india.html

Thursday, January 19, 2012

FA's and SA's

One more FA is over and I am exhausted!

 But do I have time to breathe? No… soon will come another SA to give the mother of all tensions.


School was okay (for me) until CBSE started the new system called CCE.

C – Continuous

C – Comprehensive

E – Evaluation


The school year is now divided into two semesters and the student is supposed to be evaluated continuously. Evaluated not only for his knowledge on a subject but also in other areas.









Picture Courtesy: http://cce.icbse.com/cbse-cce-system/

Earlier one could save all the tension for the the end of year ; but not so now. CBSE had only good intentions I am sure, but I have already started to dread this system. Our children, I believe are having fun since they have lots of activities to do, cooking being one of them.

Our daughter (she is in 10th now) keeps changing her answer to “what to do you want to do after the 12th” question. Since she loves interior designing, it used to be B.Arch but recently her biology teacher tried to instill into the students the merits of biology and she is not sure if she will like bio-technology. Maybe a dietician, she asks? According to this teacher, Architects these days are begging for jobs. I kept repeating that it is better to choose the subject that you are good at and to select a job that you will love to do. She is still not sure, not that I have any idea either!



As for son (in 9th std), from the time he understood that he needs to do something after 12th there was only one answer; “join the Indian army”. Daughter continues to maintain that it is only because of the war games that he plays and that he has no idea what he is talking! She says he is obsessed with India and is forever trying to educate her on the merits of his country. I believe, the only way to cure him would be to send him to India. Let him learn to love his country the real way.



But if I remember, it only seemed yesterday that we sent both of them to the nursery. Although daughter was the independent kind, it was she who cried the most on her first day to school, while our son who I thought was very shy, took like a fish to the water on the first day itself. The ensuing years were fine but now that they have reached the crucial years, like every parent I am very apprehensive.


What does the future hold for them?


Are they fit to face this world?



Today I read an excellent article by Professor B. M. Hegde:



Education today in our country has not only lost its heart; it seems to have lost its direction and goal. It is a sad situation for the future generation. Well-meaning people in society are keeping quiet. The powers that be, who ought to know better, seem to be either ignoramuses or they couldn't care less! The following case history will showcase one of the major areas where modern education, especially at the primary level, nay at all levels, is going astray to the detriment of mankind's future.


The teacher, like a midwife, should assist the student in delivering, and not deliver herself. “Every child is a genius only to be converted into an idiot in school,” wrote Nobel Laureate Alexis Carrel. Education should aim at making healthy minds and not just making wealthy careers. Here, society needs to be thoroughly deschooled to get rid of the obsession with marks and ranks in place of healthy education.



Now that I have rid of my worries (not obsessed)  with marks for the time being,  let me wind up this post in peace :)


Wednesday, June 8, 2011

A letter...

A Beautiful letter written by a father to his daughter says the forwarded email.

Following is a letter to his daughter from a renowned Hong Kong TV broadcaster and Child Psychologist. The words are actually applicable to all of us, young or old, children or parents.!

I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons.

1. Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable, nobody knows how long it lives. Some words are better said early.

2. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.

3. What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches.
Remember the following as you go through life.

1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I. To those  who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every move. When  a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.

2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess. Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through  life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose what/who you love most.

3. Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better you enjoy life.

4. Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time and with one's mood. If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.

5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does not mean that you cannot be successful by not studying hard! Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags to riches, but one has to start from some rags!

6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, neither would I financially support your whole life. My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up. After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or in your limousine, whether rich or poor.

7. You honour your words, but don't expect others to be so. You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.

8. I have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but I never strike any prize. That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard..! There is no free lunch..!

9. No matter how little time I have with you, let's treasure the time we have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

And why?

One thought education and means would save our girls. But the latest report by The Lancet tells us that it is those mothers with lesser education and wealth but with a better sense of responsibility who seems to be saving our girls.

The conditional sex ratio for second-order births when the firstborn was a girl fell from 906 per 1000 boys (99% CI 798–1013) in 1990 to 836 (733–939) in 2005; an annual decline of 0•52% (p for trend=0∙002).

Declines were much greater in mothers with 10 or more years of education than in mothers with no education, and in wealthier households compared with poorer households. By contrast, we did not detect any significant declines in the sex ratio for second-order births if the firstborn was a boy, or for firstborns.


Between the 2001 and 2011 censuses, more than twice the number of Indian districts (local administrative areas) showed declines in the child sex ratio as districts with no change or increases. After adjusting for excess mortality rates in girls, our estimates of number of selective abortions of girls rose from 0–2•0 million in the 1980s, to 1•2–4•1 million in the 1990s, and to 3•1–6•0 million in the 2000s. Each 1% decline in child sex ratio at ages 0–6 years implied 1•2–3•6 million more selective abortions of girls. Selective abortions of girls totalled about 4•2–12•1 million from 1980–2010, with a greater rate of increase in the 1990s than in the 2000s.

We did not yet see any clear evidence of selective abortion of firstborn female fetuses. This is partly because India does not enforce a one-child policy, which led to the selective abortion of firstborn female fetuses in China. However, selective abortions of first-order girls might increase if fertility drops further, particularly in urban areas.


The following maps are from the 2011 Census report.

Country wise Child Sex Ratio in age 0-6 (Year 2001 vs 2011)




Ranked State/UT wise for Year 2011


Ranked distict wise for Year 2011



Even Kerala’s sex ratio within the 1-6 range is declining.

Has Kerala too started killing their girls?

With the Indian setup in mind, it would not be fair to blame just the mother since the decision making and even power seldom rests with the mother alone in most households. Yet, let me blame those mothers who are educated and have financial means, since they have failed to exercise their position. They have succumbed to the cultural norms and failed to curb an evil practice when they could.

It is time the educated women in India stopped blaming men alone for all the woes.

What have these mothers gained from education if they fail to love/protect their own lot. Why have they failed to give a chance to girls like themselves? Is it the mother in India who yearns for a boy child more than the father?

And if education alone will not curb this, then only jail terms shall.

The Indian Government implemented a Pre-Natal Diagnostic Techniques Act in 1996 to prevent the misuse of techniques for the purpose of prenatal sex determination leading to selective abortion of girls.22 It is unlikely that this Act has been effective nationally because few health providers have been charged or convicted.

But this act has not been effective:

Furthermore, the PNDT Act itself provides scanty information about what penalties would apply either to doctors performing s*x determination tests or to in-laws and family members forcing women to seek them.

And these tests are still done under different pretexts and the information conveyed in “innovative” ways. Even sign languages!

'Laddu' Means A Boy, `Barfi' A Girl A `V' sign would normally mean `victory'. But in some northern States of the country, a doctor uses this sign after ultrasonograhpy of a pregnant woman to indicate, "Voila, it's a son!''

If the doctor asks the patient to come back on a Friday, it means it is a girl she is carrying and she should return for an abortion. And if he says, "Let's meet on Monday'', it means its going to be a boy.

"Our planners and policy makers have not understood the grip of the son complex in Indian society, nor have our sociologists and behavioural scientists done enough research on the subject,'' the study notes.

The study, which covered Kurukshetra in Haryana, Fateh Saheb in Punjab and Kangra district in Himachal Pradesh, categorically states that female foeticide was the result of an unholy alliance between the traditional preference for a son and modern medical technology, increasing greed of doctors and rising the demand for dowry that makes daughters financial burdens.

One of the main reasons that the PNDT Act has failed is "because of the connivance of doctors in s*x determination and selective abortions." These procedures have become lucrative business for many of India's medical practitioners.

For further reading.

http://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/pre-natal-diagnosis-test-act-1519.asp
http://www.thelancet.com/
http://www.censusindia.gov.in/2011census/training/district_pdf_search/district_pdf.aspx

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Still a long way to go...

Continued from previous post...



STATE-WISE INFANT MORTALITY RATE (per1000) -
Year 1961, 2003 & 2005

(please click to enlarge)

As you can see, some states in India have come a long way but as a whole India is yet to tackle hunger and poverty.

The following are the states which are showing an upward trend and it seems to continue in year 2008 too.



The following are the 2008 figures for India:





The performance is not good while compared to other countries and China seems to be doing better even here.








The infant deaths can be due to hunger as well as the poor health of the mother. The healthier the mother, the more chance there would be for an infant to survive.

Four diseases-pneumonia, diarrhoea, malaria and AIDS-accounted for 43 per cent of all deaths in children under five worldwide in 2008. Pneumonia and diarrhoea together account for a third of all under-five deaths. Most of these lives could have been saved through low-cost prevention and treatment measures, including antibiotics for acute respiratory infections, oral rehydration for diarrhoea, immunization, and the use of insecticide-treated mosquito nets and appropriate drugs for malaria. The need to refocus attention on pneumonia and diarrhoea—two of the three leading killers of children—is urgent.


Worldwide mortality in children younger than 5 years has dropped from 11•9 million deaths in 1990 to
7•7 million deaths in 2010, consisting of 3•1 million neonatal deaths, 2•3 million postneonatal deaths, and 2•3 million childhood deaths (deaths in children aged 1–4 years). 33•0% of deaths in children younger than 5 years occur in south Asia and 49•6% occur in sub-Saharan Africa, with less than 1% of deaths occurring in high-income countries. Across 21 regions of the world, rates of neonatal, postneonatal, and childhood mortality are declining. The global decline from 1990 to 2010 is 2•1% per year for neonatal mortality, 2•3% for postneonatal mortality, and 2•2% for childhood mortality. In 13 regions of the world, including all regions in sub-Saharan Africa, there is evidence of accelerating declines from 2000 to 2010 compared with 1990 to 2000. Within sub-Saharan Africa, rates of decline have increased by more than 1% in Angola, Botswana, Cameroon, Congo, Democratic Republic of the Congo, Kenya, Lesotho, Liberia, Rwanda, Senegal, Sierra Leone, Swaziland, and The Gambia.


Source:
Neonatal, postneonatal, childhood, and under-5 mortality for 187 countries, 1970–2010: a systematic analysis of progress towards Millennium Development Goal 4 www. thelancet.com
http://indiabudget.nic.in/es2006-07/chapt2007/tab95.pdf
http://www.foodjustice.net/report/ngo-reports/india/India_Hunger_Index_2008.pdf/view
http://www.childinfo.org/mortality.html

Monday, June 7, 2010

The news that we would rather not read...


Kerala seems to be treating it's children comparatively better, but since I cannot find the data for previous years, I am not sure if the figures have risen or are falling.

Edited to add the following:

 
Source: Hindustan Times, Wikipedia: NFHS-3 Nutritional Status of Children".

Wisdom speaks....

Saw this in many blogs and I am tempted to post it even here...

The wisdom of a great Father shines through.....

A letter written by Abraham Lincoln to the head master of his school in which his son was studying...

He will have to learn, I know, that all men are not just, all men are not true. But teach him also that for every scoundrel there is a hero: that far every selfish politician, there is a dedicated leader…


Teach him that for every enemy there is a friend. It will take time, I know a long time, but teach, if you can, that a dollar earned is of more value then five of found.


Teach him, to learn to lose…And also to enjoy winning. Steer him away from envy, if you can, teach him the the secret of quiet laughter.


Teach him, if you can the wonder of books…But also given quiet time wonder the eternal mystery of birds in the sky, bees in the sun, and flowers on the green hillside.


In school teach him, it is far more honorable to fail than to cheat…


Teach him to have faith in his own idea, even if everyone tells him they are wrong…


Teach him to be gentle with gentle people and tough with tough.


Teach him to listen to all men…But teach him also to filter all he hears on a screen of truth, and take only the good one that comes through.


Teach him, if you can, how to laugh when he is sad. Teach him there is no shame in tear.


Teach him to sell his brawn and brain to the highest bidder but never to put a prize tag on his heart and soul.


Teach him gently, but do not cuddle him, because only the test of fire makes the fine steel.


Teach him always to have sublime faith in himself because only then he will have faith in mankind.


This is a big order, but see what can you do… He is such a fine little fellow, my son!

Monday, December 21, 2009

Sunitha needs your attention....

Finally I found time to watch Sunitha Krishnan’s presentation on TED.

I did read about her much earlier in a magazine and other bloggers GVK and IHM have already mentioned about her TED presentation in their own blogs in a compelling manner. Yet, I felt that the least I could do was mention her in my own blog though she and the cause that she has taken up deserves much more attention.

Sunitha herself is a victim and she says that she could never remember the incident clearly but the anger she felt was very intense and it is always the anger part that she remembers. It is this anger that led her to act. In her blog she writes thus.. There was a time in my life when I used to think if I meet God on the road, I may just kill him/her with my bare hands.

It took time for the healing and she again writes thus: In that journey I also realized that God is not somebody I might meet on the road…he/she is everywhere, in me, around me and with me. And then I started feeling the God experience in this journey which not only touched the fragile soul of the child but also my angry soul.

She starts the presentation with the story of three children who were rescued after being raped brutally.

In her presentation she neither moralises nor offers a solution. I think in her struggle she has realized that the task is very difficult and would remain so since the world where we live is a very complex one.

We as a society have justified prostitution in our own way. Let me jot down some of them.

- It is age old and it has been there and will always be there. (Men hunted animals for food, rubbed stones to get fire but does not do it anymore .. they evolved out of it.) For many this is the only business they want to do since the return is high. An article in the New York Times in February 2008 stated that officials estimate that sexual transactions in Amsterdam (where prostitution is legalized) account for about 100 million US dollars per year. The demand is high and hence the supply will be maintained. I am not sure if the demand earlier was for children as young as 3 years and if not, then either the demand has increased out of control or the supply has dwindled.... or our society has become much perverse. (Sunitha has rescued both boys and girls)

- If prostitutes are not there in a society then the rest of the women will be affected. It means to say that me or you are able to walk free in this society since the needs of a section of the society are being taken care of by these unfortunates and that we should just forget the fact it includes children too. One should also ignore the fact that these children and some others were never given a choice.

-Men and women are built differently and men just cannot control themselves as much as the women. Since I am from the female category maybe it is not like the urge to eat a chocolate or to purchase the beautiful set of jewelry on display. But then it discredits men (still in majority?) who has a control over these urges.

I am not sure if there is a real solution to this malady although some say that legalizing this trade could make it safer. But then statistics especially in Netherlands which legalized in 2000 tells otherwise.

In the Netherlands, women in prostitution point out that legalization or decriminalization of the sex industry cannot erase the stigma of prostitution but, instead, makes women more vulnerable to abuse because they must register and lose anonymity.

Thus, the majority of women in prostitution still choose to operate illegally and underground.


Legalizing this trade may help only those who seek the service but not the ones who are required to do this service. It may give those seeking it, protection and dignity in the society but not to the ones who are offering the service. Those seeking the service may still have a heart attack if he finds out that his sister, daughter or wife is also offering this service.

Legalizing prostitution or adultery may also help in cases such as the current "hot news" haunting the Congress party in Kerala. They know not what action to take since they fear they themselves may not come clean.

As for child trafficking/prostitutes the story in Netherlands is also not different.

Another argument for legalizing prostitution in the Netherlands was that it would help end child prostitution. In reality, however, child prostitution in the Netherlands has increased dramatically during the 1990s. The Amsterdam-based ChildRight organization estimates that the number has gone from 4,000 children in 1996 to 15,000 in 2001. The group estimates that at least 5,000 of the children in prostitution are from other countries, with a large segment being Nigerian girls (Tiggeloven: 2001).


We may not be able to do much but our apathy and our attitude to the victims have to change. We cannot also close our eyes to what is happening around. Sunitha herself was ostracized from the society for two years when she was just a victim. At a time when she deserved all help from the society, it turned against her. Later when she tried helping other victims she was yet again targeted and bullied. (She lost the sense of hearing in one ear and one of her staff was killed during a rescue operation0

A few more links...

http://www.uri.edu/artsci/wms/hughes/netherl.htm
http://www.unesco.org/courier/1998_12/uk/ethique/txt1.htm#e1

Thursday, December 10, 2009

And we were O.K.

Received this via email I am not sure who the author is.. it may not even have originated from an Indian but yet I am sure most of us can relate to it.. so with due respect to the creator and with additions of my own in italics…

To all the wonderful kids who were born in India , grew up in the 60's,70's and 80's and survived :

First, we survived being born to mothers, some, whose husbands smoked and/or drank while they carried us.

They took aspirin, ate whatever food was put on the table, and didn't get tested for diabetes.

They were mothers who did not check their blood pressure every few minutes. (mine didn’t)

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes we had no helmets, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking or going out on our own. (nd all those longs walks up the mountains and along the streams with none to guide but just the dogs)

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or airbags. [Our car would have been the most rickety since it had to go through the terrible tea estate roads. Needless to mention that only an Ambassador was built for it. Thinking about it now, I still cannot believe that my Father, instead of repairing the door which would not close [the mechanics had already closed shops after our late night movie] asked me to faithfully hold onto it while driving up a 20 km long treacherous mountainous road (Mundakayam to Kuttikanam)… I dont remember my Father looking back even once to see if I was still there! And recently when I mentioned this to him he feigned ignorance:) ]

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle. (ahh the water was the purest!)

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this. (dint we all? and most still do…)

We would share a dosa, dip a chapatti into someone else's plate of curry without batting an eyelid. (I hope the current generation still enjoys this)

We ate jam sandwiches or pickle on bread and butter, raw mangoes with salt (& chilly powder) and drank orange squash with sugar and water in it.

We ate at roadside stalls, drank water from tender coconuts, ate everything - Bhel Puri to bhajias and samosas, but we weren't overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING! (there was no dearth of games.. we made games out of nothing…but now the kids can have all the PS$.. and still be bored)

We would leave home in the morning and play all day during the holidays, we were never ever bored, and we were allowed freedom all day as long as we were back when the streetlights came on, or when our parents told us to do so. No one was able to reach us all day by mobile phone or phone. (those were the days!)

And we were O.K.

We swam with an inflated tube which we got from somebody who was replacing their car tyres.

We ran barefoot without thinking about it, if we got cut we used iodine on it which made us jump. We did not wash our hands ten times a day. (Wash hands?)
And we were OK.

We did not have parents who said things like "what would you like for breakfast, lunch or dinner".

We ate what was put in front of us and best of all, there was never any leftovers. (but now we have to push and prod them to eat..)

We fell out of trees numerous times, got cut, broke bones and teeth. (We jumped from one tree to another and my younger sister was the leader!)

We ate fruit lying on the ground that we shook down from the tree above. (and how tasty those were!)And we never washed the fruit.

We had a bath using a bucket and mug. We did not know what shampoo and conditioners meant.

Yet this generation of ours has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

Please pass this on to others who have had the luck and good fortune to grow up as kids in India in the 60's 70's and 80's.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Projectwhy

Did not post anything since I was busy enjoying the 9 days holidays that we had in Kuwait.

Today I want to write about a blog which energize me each time I visit it. The blog, Projectwhy drowns my cynicism and taunts me too. I often lament about things but don’t do much about it, other than blog. But at projectwhy, one sees the other side of life and the way it is dealt with, in such a sincere manner. The author touches so many lives and continues to shine ever so brightly for them. I also love the way she deals with many of our current issues..



Here are my sincere wishes and prayers to Projectwhy.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Recovering India's money

This is the first time I have deleted a post and it was something that landed in my inbox about recovering the money in the Swiss bank.. when I checked on the people behind the initiative, I did not like what I read about most of them...

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Motherhood... a never ending journey...

Have been tagged by Smitha and IHM; both versatile bloggers and great Moms, to write about motherhood. Let me try and do some justice.

Motherhood…. the word that has the most warmth and hopefulness.

Nothing else in this world can change a person and the world overnight! At first it is the excitement of waiting eagerly to see what one has produced [of course jointly :)]. And can one be blamed if one sees it as the perfect creation? My sonogram taken only since the doctor requested, predicted 90% boy child and hence we were totally surprised and delighted to find our first born to be a girl.

When one embarks upon the journey of motherhood, you want everything to go perfectly. This child should feel nothing wanting; not if one can help it. You strive to be a better mother than your own... and can we ever be? Ah..from there starts the incredible journey of discovering your own mother/father in bits and pieces.

My mother was at home for me but that luxury was something I had to forgo. But then I never wanted to be a stay at home mother until I became a mother! Strange?

The endless burping that kept the little one awake after I fed her.. was it all those oranges that I sneaked in since only a glass of water was allowed? (to tighten one’s stomach they say and with no internet nor my own mother, I was under the mercy of the midwife!)

The first day of work and you have to leave your precious with the maid. I dreaded it and would have done anything to change it.

The endless phone calls with the exasperated maid (and countless thereafter that we had to experiment with) . Can’t I just trust them?

The days flew too fast until we discovered by accident that the next one was due soon! (And was it not for “accidents” we would have never gone for the second and hence would have missed the next bundle of joy!)

The sneaked in kisses to the little one who came in a little too early, so as not to offend our first born. Was it jealousy that I saw on her face? How it hurt me to see that look on her face. How could I ever make her understand that she was equally precious to me? And this task continues; the mystery of sibling rivalry shall never be solved they say. Sometimes they purposely use it to test us.

Then you discover that you daughter just like yourself thinks her father is the perfect one. I pray that she, just like her own mother will do her very best for her dear father. As for son; he knows how to make a fool of both the parents. And after a while you surrender your “know all” attitude and offer “pranam”. Yea we have to grow up and change in time with the kids.

So before I go on and on endlessly let me list the few things that I can remember and love about motherhood, if I have not already stated them!

• It is the most life changing event. Nothing prepares one for it but once you get the little one in your hands then motherhood comes to you naturally. All those tiny doubts vanish and you are left with entirely new ones which you never fathomed!

• If one needs to understand the Almighty then motherhood / fatherhood is the best school. Your kids teach you the true meaning of unconditional love. While we as parents also give unconditional love, showing it is not equally spontaneous ( reminds me yet again to demonstrate the love that I have for them). As for one’s faith.. if one has not developed it along with the ups and downs of motherhood then I think nothing else can do it so well.

• Do you cry in front of strangers? Yes.. motherhood makes you to do that. Motherhood exposes one’s vulnerability and there is nothing that you can do about it. You are capable of emotions (even anger) in an entirely new way. You take interest in every event/article that maybe remotely connected with your children.

• Dreams….you stop dreaming for yourself, and pick up your children’s dreams. (not a good practice?) The dreams can vary as years go by. Son wanted to be a police Inspector until the recent Bombay massacre. Then it was the army or a fighter pilot. As for daughter, we have no idea from where she picked up the idea of Indian Civil Service.. but we keep hearing lofty dreams. “Can I keep those roads perfect if I become a “Collector”?” “I shall ban all the cigarette companies if I become a “Collector”” ah.. If only she knew! Our textbooks, schools and our country have not failed to inspire our children, if only we could keep those flames alive. I dream for my children a country devoid of corruption and where our youngsters will not turn cynical and where their dreams are not quashed.

• Politics was Greek to me and a subject I abhorred until motherhood forced me to look into it. I realized that my children’s future is entwined with the politics and economics of my country and I started paying attention to dear Hubby. Now, the news channel is what gets my most attention!

• Motherhood/parenthood makes one finally understand your parents. Your parents become more precious to you.





Over the years we always wish we could have done it differently! The quest for perfect mothering never ends…...

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Be ragged or else be damned?

When did we start seeing “ragging” as a part of college curriculum?

Is ragging necessary to mould a student?

I have heard students and teachers justify “ragging”. They say it helps a person to face the real world. Is it so? Will the scars of ragging ever fade? And sometimes the scars can be physical too as in this recent case in a reputed college in Coimbatore.


Another ragging incident jolts India
Sunday, 12.04.2009, 08:29am (GMT)
Kochi/Coimbatore : Ragging extends to be a threat in colleges despite severe stricture passed by the Supreme Court to ban it.

Another shocking incident has come to light this time in Tamil Nadu. The incident dates back to March 8, a day after the medical student buckled under to injuries inflicted by his seniors at a private-run institute in Himachal Pradesh.

A 19-year old fresher at the PSG College of Arts and Science in Coimbatore was ragged savagely, nearly losing his eye.

Akil Dev is now recouping at his home in Kochi, and has underwent two operations in the eyes so far.





New Delhi, Friday 13 March 2009:

In another shocking incident of a student being ragged in college, a girl student of an agriculture engineering college in Andhra’s Baptla town has attempted suicide. The 20-year-old student of the Government Agriculture Engineering College attempted suicide after allegedly being ragged and physically abused by her seniors.
Reports say that, the alleged victim was forced to strip and dance as part of ragging. Embarrassed by the entire episode, she consumed a hairdye solution and collapsed. Some reports also state that it may have been pesticides that she consumed.


The meaning of Ragging:

- to scold somebody persistently or vehemently
- to subject somebody to persistent teasing or taunting

Yes, it is taunting as a start and those who resist the taunting are then subjected to torture.

I remember my hostel days in Trivandrum where one student in our batch was caught ragging her juniors. The punishment that was meted out was for the whole batch and I still remember standing in the open area in the middle of the hostel and writing imposition. We did try to have a little fun out of it, but none of us ever wanted to rag. And none of my friends ever found ragging fun and I don’t remember being ragged. But the scene has changed over the recent years and now students are scared to join some colleges in fear of ragging. I have heard it myself from parents and students. Some parents were forced to seek admission in “safer” colleges for their wards after having paid the fees and when the wards refused to continue. Some students eventually lose a year for this sake. Do we call these students “chicken hearted”? I do not think so. Even if a student end up being a total “nerd” for not having interacted normally with the students, I guess it would be fine than scarring him/her permanently. And our world does need such students too.

I was relieved to find this on the web:

http://www.noragging.com/

http://noragging.blogspot.com/

Monday, February 9, 2009

A love letter

Thanks to the internet, I have now started receiving love letters.

The below one is classic and I can see that he is already honing his skills for the future. Wonder how many he will sent once he starts admiring girls.....



Amma I love you so much . U r my angel......

Monday, January 12, 2009

Which is the best example to follow

Came across the book, “Stories for Parents: by the Author Paulo Coelho. Couldn’t’ resist posting a story:

Which is the best example to follow:

Dov Beer of Mezeritch was asked:

“Which is the best example to follow? That of the pious man who dedicates his life to God without ever asking why, or that of the erudite man, who tries to understand the will of the Almighty?

“The best example to follow is that of the child” replied Dov Beer.

“ But a child knows nothing. It does not even understand what reality is!’ was the general response.


“There you are much mistaken, because the child has four qualities that we should never forget. A child is always happy for no reason. A child is always busy. When a child wants something, he or she shows great persistence and determination in demanding that thing. Lastly, a child is always very quick to stop crying.


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I guess I have come across such people in my life and they are happy as a child is!

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

A Father's Prayer

Felt very tempted to copy this prayer......

A Father's Prayer


This is the best dowry of hopes, wishes and prayers I would be able to offer:

May God give you the grace of wit and wisdom to understand that rainbows are only the result of showers, dust, and hope.

May you always have joy in the morning and trust in the evening and may your sorrows be short and without scars.

May your lives have a spirit neither bent by belligerence nor broken by failure; may you simply love each other.

May you share with each other spring flowers, dirty dishes, music, rain, death, mushrooms, a measure of boredom, strawberries, and God.

May that God never make you immune to the wonderful afflictions of real love, making you instead farsighted to each other's faults, tongue-tied to criticism, and short of memory to petty hurts and slights.

May God provide the confidence and serenity that comes only from the assurance of each other's fidelity and the tolerance, as years go by, of wrinkles and gray hairs, short tempers, curlers, and Monday mornings.

May no one steal from you laughter at the top of the stairs or giggles and whispers in a dark room.

May you keep a hunger for each other, the appetite to taste tomorrow, and deep knowledge of and devotion to your past, heritage and families.

May you perpetuate trust, the radiation of vitality, kind answers to sharp questions and sharp humor to unkind attitudes.

May your fights be fierce and short, and may each truce be warm and long and held in each other's arms before the sun comes up.

May you walk with wise men, sing loud songs at late hours, share secrets, have healthy children, and provide smiles for lonesome strangers and prayers for those without hope.

May you never forget small things; smiles, birthdays, holding hands, family, old friends, the neglected, and the simplicity of saying please and thank you.

May you keep a warm, generous, and happy house where love is the insulation and God is present.

May your union bring a smile to the face of the Almighty and may his spirit live in your pots and pans, in your hope and aspirations.


- Author Unknown

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Pornography and Child Predators



These numbers are startling:

•1 out of 3 children* are exposed to sexually explicit images online they did not want to view
(Previously 1 in 4 )
• 79%* of exposures occur at home
• 9%* occur at school
• *Not advising adults of exposures has also gotten worse
(*Youth Internet Safety Study-2)
• Average age of 1st exposure is 11 years old(Family Safe Media)
• Pornography is a tool frequently used by predators to lure and coax children--
• Pornography is now going "mobile"(cell phones, etc)
To continue reading, please check this site.. http://internetsafetyadvisor.info/pornography/


What disturbed me most was..

Pornography-after first exposure:

• The desire and need to keep coming back for pornographic images.
• * Escalation - The need for more explicit, rougher, and more deviant images for the same sexual effect.
• * Desensitization - Materiel once viewed as shocking or taboo is seen as acceptable or commonplace.
• * Acting out - The tendency to perform the behaviors viewed, including exhibitionism, sadistic/masochistic sex, group sex, rape, or sex with minor children
(Dr. Victor Cline, clinical psychologist at the University

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Happy Birthday


To our dearest daughter..

A few years ago this day God gave a precious gift to us.
You came as an answer to our fervent prayers.
You were so beautiful but very serious.
You wanted to be as independent as you could be even when you were a little baby.

We hope the very best for you our daughter.
And although you have grown tall.. in our hearts you still remain the little baby that you were.

We may worry and fret over you.. bear with us.

May this world be kind to you as you are kind to others.
May this world be considerate to you as you are considerate to others.
May this world be a happy place to you as you try to make this place happier.
May you face the challenges that this world throws with courage and fortitude.
May you have more patience dear daughter.. the world will wait for you.

Above all.. may your faith in our Almighty grow leap by leap each year.

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